"Although I speak from my own experience, I feel that no one has the right to impose his or her beliefs on another person. I will not propose to you that my way is best. The decision is up to you. If you find some point which may be suitable for you, then you can carry out experiments for yourself. If you find that it is off no use, then you can discard it." Dalai Lama...

Wednesday, 25 January 2012

Growth spurts, duvet days, struggles and beach therapy :-)

Milly has shot up! I swear she put on an inch overnight. She came down the other morning and had to do a double take - she is 5'7" now just 2" shorter than me. That would explain the past few weeks of constant eating and inability to stay full for longer than an hour :-)
The flip side to all that growth is a period of hibernation and out of sync body clock.
 For quite some time her pattern has been to be asleep around 12pm (ish ) and waking around 11am ( ish ) give or take an hour or so either side. 
Over the last week to ten days she has been unable to sleep at night and consequently unable to wake any time before noon.

Initially I was ok with that but as it lengthened into a week I began to wobble - especially as it was 4 or 5 in the morning she was awake til even though she was in bed well before that. She had asked to be woken at certain times each morning but would then fall back to sleep. I made her breakfast and would call her down and she would come down grumpy and inevitably we would end up grumpy with each other through the day. She didn't want to go anywhere or do anything.
 One morning when she fell back to sleep again I felt myself getting very angry. Instead of doing or saying something I might regret I sat and tried to understand where the anger ( fear ) was coming from. I knew my reaction was so much more about me and where my head was at that moment - a lot going on at the moment  - stressy head on ;-))
Having been here before and working through it I found it much easier to process and came out of it very quickly.
I decided to accept where we were and not continue to worry and try to change it.

The next morning I went to wake her at the time she had asked me to. I woke her gently and asked if she wanted me to start breakfast. She asked me to wait half an hour then start it. I did that and then instead of asking her to come down I took it up to her.
She stayed in bed all day - daydreaming and watching friends DVDs.
Throughout the day I took her snacks and lunch and left her to it. She got up late afternoon, had a shower, brushed her teeth etc and got dressed and came down very chipper:-)
Over the next few days our time together - quality rather than quantity :-)) was harmonious.

One evening we sat cuddling and ( I can't remember how it came up in the conversation or the exact words ) her duvet days were mentioned and I said something along the lines of  how glad I was that she was able to enjoy the time to cocoon and how I had been worried for a while about her lack of motivation but had become more relaxed about it.
She said, yes she had noticed and it had made her happy :-)

She had requested a walk on the beach and so we set off one windy and rainy day to get some beach therapy:-)

We didn't stay too long - just long enough to blow the cobwebs away.
It is a magical place, the Sea, I never fail to feel better after a visit - whatever the weather.


Lily said...

Loving the posts on sleep! We're going through changes in sleep patterns at the moment and it's great to read about how you've handled things. Thanks.

Lynn said...

Oh I am pleased Lily! I know I gained a great deal from reading the blogs of people with older children who had been on the unschooling path and had experiences to share :-0 xx